Your Body Speaks

That's the objective of the 5th speech project I completed last week during the 821st Toastmasters meeting. Had to talk using my body - you know, gestures, eye contact, pacing and all. It took me awhile to come up with that speech as I'm a bit of a shy type. Well, somehow I did manage to slacken off a little bit. And just proud of myself for being able to overcome nervousness on stage. I think I did fairly well when it comes to the delivery of the speech. Thanks to Dr. Matt McGarrity of University of Washington for the tips on the conversational way of public speaking, my delivery was more natural; though it was prepared in advance.

Anyhow, here's my speech. Thanks to the old Bengali lady, I came up with an informative manuscript.

A Subtle Talk

On my work to work this morning, I saw a big Facebook thumbs up sign along Khurais Road. Then, I remember something and I thought of sharing this with you...

When you hold up your index finger, pinkie and thumb like this (sign), the entire universe knows that you mean to say I Love You. Now, if you hold down the thumb with the middle and ring fingers, half of the world will rock and the other half will go crazy. This is the sign of the horns. In US, we know this sign is associated with the rock stars. But in Mediterranean countries, like Egypt, Lebanon, Syria or Morocco, this is used to tell a man that his wife is cheating on him. 

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and guest.

Growing up in a multi-national and multi-cultural environment is very fascinating. You meet a lot of people from different places. You get acquainted with different norms and traditions. Here in Saudi Arabia, the people around us give us a glimpse of the different parts of the world. Americans, Europeans, Middle-Eastern, Africans, Asians – we see them everywhere and yes, communicating is not easy. We always settle with the customary ‘Assalamu Alaikum’ greeting. However, communication does not always have to go with words. Most of the time, we speak without saying a word; about 80% of what we communicate is non-verbal. Smirking, winking or pouting could give a lot of meanings. Body language could give a different implication to people even when real intentions are pure. Just like how you look at me now while I speak in front.

One time there was nothing much to do in the office; I had the chance to pore over one of the cleaners, an old Bengali woman. I watched how she talked to her colleagues, her movements and facial expressions. After awhile, I approached her and we had a short chat.

Fellow Toastmasters, think about the last time you talked to a Bengali. Did you ever notice that when you speak to them, they move their chin forward? How about the frequent tilting of their heads sideways? To others, such mannerism is a bit annoying and it appears to like they don’t care about what we’re saying; but for your information they actually do it as courtesy or good manners. They actually use their chins to point at something and they tilt their heads to one side to agree with someone.

The way people listen, look, move and react affects how others see them. What we say verbally and what we act with our body are totally two different languages. The listener or the viewers have to choose whether to believe your verbal or non-verbal message; and usually, we choose the non-verbal because it’s more natural. It is an instinctive language that shows our true feelings and intentions.

People from different origins have different customs that imply different meanings to other nationalities.

Looking back at the past, we, Filipinos, being occupied by Americans for nearly a decade, have already been accustomed to their culture. We have adapted a lot. One of the most familiar hand signals of the Americans is the thumbs-up sign. Though this means “good going”, “okay”, “good job”, other nationalities like Iranians, Africans or Bengalis have a different interpretation. For them, it expresses sexual connotation or, to bluntly say, the upraised middle finger. Now I wonder if that’s one of the reasons why Facebook is not allowed in certain countries.

Anyhow, despite the struggle in talking to the old Bengali woman, with our basic English and Arabic skills, we managed to understand each other.

You see, we are faced with this challenge every day especially when we deal with other nationalities. Behavior and gestures are interpreted differently. Communication barrier has become ordinary. Knowing about the norms and traditions of our foreign brothers and sisters makes us appreciate their ways and somehow, gives us confidence as it creates a connection with them.

So, while we continuously live and work here in Saudi Arabia, in every tick of the clock, our ability to communicate effectively and appropriately with people of other cultures is challenged. It becomes more and more important to improve the sensitivity and understanding for the values, views, and ways of living and thinking of others. As the American best-seller book author Morgan Scott-Peck said, “Share our similarities and celebrate our differences.”

Unleash the Hero in Me

We all have our own preference of an ideal hero. They may take the form of animation or human. They may be visible or not. But they're everywhere. They are people or individuals who does something for others who are in need. They're selfless; they do not ask to be paid and in one way or another, they take risks to some extent.

Now, truth be told, we all want to be heroes. We all want to do something that will dramatically impact a situation - which is what we are actually doing now. Being here in the kingdom, working and providing for our loved ones. Somewhere somehow in a corner of our minds we are hoping that this sacrifice, this heroic deed, will allow us to live extraordinary lives that we all need and worked hard for.

During last week's Toastmaster meeting, the theme, Unleash the Hero in Me, was set. It was a commemoration of the Philippines Independence Day and 'twas just about the right time when Henry Cavill had his debut in the big screen as Clark Kent. I had the (third) chance again of being the Topicmaster. Below are the questions I prepared but only the first four (4) were asked to prominent and experienced Toastmasters because we were running out of time.

• Emilio Aguinaldo said, "We cannot free ourselves unless we move forward united in a single desire." How do you think will this apply to the current situation of OFWs in the kingdom?
• If you will be a hero, what heroic deed would you do for a villain?
• If you will be a superhero, what supernatural power would you like to posses - teleport, telekinesis or foreseeing of future? Why?
• People said OFWs are unsung heroes. In that case, who do you think are the villains and how did they become one?
• What is the first step of becoming a hero?
• When do you say a hero has stopped becoming a hero?
• In an animated film, the main character, Megamind said "Destiny is not the path given to us; but it is the path we choose for ourselves." Do you agree or not? Why?
• Who is sexier? Catwoman or Black Widow? Why?

I seem to be trending as Table Topics Master. I hope to try some other roles in the coming sessions and finish my manual in the soonest possible time.

Ciao!

Magic!

Magic is the art of constructing something that is desired. Spells, voodoo dolls, wands, symbols and many other objects or rituals are used to form magic. Some do it as a sign of worship; while others perform for entertainment. Regardless of the intent, magic, nowadays is evident in different forms. We may not realize this consciously but magic is the attitude of believing in yourself that you can make things happen. Things happen in our lives because of fate and there are things that we do in our lives because of choice. I would like to believe that magic is the entirety of fate, choice and perseverance because the combination of those three will give you the desired outcome.

I had another opportunity of being the Table Topics Master in one of the Toastmasters meetings held last month and here are the questions I prepared...

In the movie Pirates of the Caribbean, Captain Barbossa said, "The moonlight shows us what we really are." Please expound.

Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore said, "We must all face the choice between what is right and what is easy." Please expound.

If you will be joining the crowd of Red Queen's closest comrades, what part of your body would you sacrifice to awkwardly enlarge for the rest of your life? Why?

Would you choose to transform to an unattractive ogre, like Fiona, to be with the person you love or stay pretty and be with someone who loves you but you don't love in return? Why?

Joining the cast of Vampire Diaries and given the chance to sink your teeth into Stefan Salvatore, which part of your body would you like to bite? Why?

In the movie Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, it was said that "It is not our abilities that show what we truly are. It is our choices." Please expound.

Do you believe in magic? In what way real magic takes place in your everyday life?

'Twas indeed another wacky night; so wacky that I forgot blogging about it. Good thing, I was told to do another session this coming Tuesday. Wonder what will be the meeting theme...

See yah!

The Vision of the Specs

I have a new eyeglass on... 

Life changing and challenging... This spec is irritating and overwhelming at the same time. Irritating because my vision now has borders. Overwhelming because I am getting a clear vision... I love and hate it at the same time. And I want people to know that. So, I wrote something about it and delivered it as a speech for my Toastmaster 4th basic manual project, How to Say It.

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and guest/s.

The ability to see is one of the most significant, if not the best, senses of an individual. We all have eyes to see things around us. We were all born with eyes. Yes, there are some who are physically disabled; yet in one way or another, they find ways to have the ability to see. But how about us, normal people, do we value our eyesight? Do we find ways to see the real thing? Do we take care of our eyes?

It’s more than a month since I got these glasses and this is not the first time. I used to have one with coating that should protect my eyes but I feel my eyeballs were always on fire. Friends told me to get lenses but I snubbed it because of the possible harmful effects. Family asked me to undergo surgery but I have to consider financial priorities first. This time, I have to start putting this on again. My myopia is getting worst.

I love seeing things. I love watching whatever is happening around me. My vision is very important for me to gather and keep memories. I like watching leaves falling from the trees during autumn. I like seeing my breath forms a fog during winter. I like it when my eyes are dancing at the sight of the vibrant flowers on spring. I could keep numerous photographs of them in my mind.

But there’s a lot more than what our naked eyes can perceive. As the saying goes, the eyes are the window of the soul. We can see through people. Just looking at them makes us feel their emotions and understand their situations. Like the pain I feel in every kick my son gets during his Taekwondo match; or the frustration I share with my husband just seeing the road traffic 5 kilometers ahead. In my case, I would have a hard time to vividly see all those things without an eyeglass. Wearing this could be a lifetime commitment and I intend to do so faithfully. Aside from having the ability to see, I would also like to have the capability to see clearly.

In my case, life is blurred without glasses. Memories are stained. The images in my mind are smudged. We may have the ways to improve our vision with the use of the latest technology yet it goes with limitations. With eyeglasses, it allows us to reflect on ourselves from time to time and show us the opportunities to clean the blotches.

Though my view will be slightly obstructed, these glasses will give me the chance to clearly see Daddy and Mommy’s wrinkles; it will give me hope to see my husband’s crow’s feet as we grow old together and the tiny toes of my children’s children. Even if I feel weight on the bridge of my nose, this bridge will serve to connect the visions to my mind where good memories are kept.

Putting on these glasses is not just about protecting my eyes or correcting vision problems. Though there are inconveniences wearing this but the benefits that one can get will outshine them. Within the four corners of this frame, life will be brighter and memories will be sharper.

Milk..

..is the title of my 3rd speech in Toastmasters. I spoke about the significance of milk in someone's life. Actually, I wanted to talk about my sister and her condition, Down Syndrome, but I want my message to leave a mark on those who will hear it; so I had to tweak something in the story... I hope it will serve its purpose..

I don’t like milk. I know it’s tasty; but for me, it’s gluey.

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and guest/s.

When I was young, I was told to drink milk because it’s good for my health. When I get sick, I would be bribed to consume at least half of the glass. You know, I could only settle for chocolate or strawberry milk.

Let me tell you a story about someone I know who likes milk so much. Her name is Angelica. When Angelica was conceived, her mom would always crave for fresh milk. She will not last a day without drinking even a glass of it. Little did she know that her baby is developing an extra chromosome – a Down Syndrome. No, Downs is not caused by drinking too much milk. It is a genetic flaw.

So, Angelica has a Down syndrome but unlike other children with the same condition, she grew up with a physically-strong built. The milk her mom consumed has given her strong bones and muscles. Her skin is as fair and white as milk. She has speech defects but she talks fast. There are times she can be as smart as an adult and silly as a 5-year old. She can do household choirs on her own like dusting, ironing, washing dishes. She would mount on chairs to reach the cupboard and look for milk. She would skip meals just to eat powdered milk.

Angelica is the most precious member of the family. She had been through a lot without her realizing the sorrow and bitterness of life. She became the family’s source of strength especially when her parents were detained in the kingdom for selling liquor. At the age of 9, she was held in custody for several months along with her mom who was so remorseful because her daughter had to stay with her and not because of their misdeed. But Angelica gave her hope and taught her to accept the circumstances without ill feelings.

Food is limited in the detention center but Angelica would always beam with a smile, dance around and yell “Halib! Halib!” at the sight of milk. In that place, her round face was like moonlight in the midst of darkness.

Being the youngest, Angelica is a Daddy’s girl. She tails her father everywhere he goes. One time, she went with him. While driving Angelica’s father started to feel dizzy so he kept blinking his eyes. Angelica was unaware of what her father was experiencing at that time. She was just innocently looking out the window. Suddenly, Angelica asked to turn left and stop. Dizziness was becoming worst; so he parked on the roadside. Then, Angelica asked him to get down the car and buy her milk. It was only then did he realize that they stopped in front of a store. So, he went down the car with heavy feet but before reaching the store, he noticed that beside it is a private clinic and for unknown reason, it pulled him inside. There, he fainted and lost consciousness.

Angelica’s father was awakened by the voices of his wife and daughter. He was in a hospital bed and his hand was injected with an IV. He had hypertension that caused him to faint. It was a good thing Angelica asked him to buy milk or no one knows what could’ve happened to them.

We all know milk is essential in the development of bones, teeth, muscles and blood. It is what we drink when we want to recover from our illnesses. It is what we drink when we want to replenish nutrients in our body. For Angelica and her parents, it has become a very important part of their lives.

Now, the next time you are served milk, take it. Drink it and remember her story. Think of the milk that made her body strong despite having Downs. Think of the milk that taught them to accept challenges with no resentment. Think of the milk that became an instrument for them to continue living life. Think about Angelica, my sister.