Simple Principles to Raise a Successful Child

"Parenting doesn't come with an instruction manual." I'd like to quote the author of this statement but I can't remember where I read it from. And I have to agree. There's just no flowchart....

But then, I found this book of Alex A. Lluch...

I bought it from Jarir Bookstore about two months ago. At first I was skeptical in buying the book but the summary at the back cover convinced me. 

I have just finished reading it and I'm giving it an A+! I'm highly recommending it especially for those parents who are not fond of reading. This reference book does not have many texts to read. It's straightforward and it goes with principles - numbered and bolded - which makes it easy to go back to from time to time.

It tackles a lot of areas in parenting e.g. communication, discipline, motivation, spirituality, and etc. I enjoyed it a lot and took me awhile to finish it because I had to keep reading again and pondering on our parenting style. 

Here are some of my favorites among the 200 Simple Principles...

#3 Play with and tickle your children often.
#8 Learn the power of hugs. Hug your children frequently.
#14 Teach your children the meaning of the word "nonnegotiable."
#21 When you have to say "no," but can't come up with a good reason, simply say, "I cannot let you do that because I love you."
#26 Whenever there is a conflict between you and your children, ask them what they would do if they were the parent.
#51 Concentrate on the positive.
#56 When you are angry, stop to think about what you're going to say before you say it.
#60 Remember, children do not develop positive or negative behaviors unless we reinforce one or the other.
#77 Teach your children the benefits of exercise.
#108 Encourage reading.
#118 Teach children the value of money, saving and investing.
#152 Give your children purpose in life and they will flourish beyond your expectations.
#161 Teach your children that faith is crucial in dealing with life's challenges.
#164 Teach your children that the glass is half full, not half empty.
#174 Don't give the message to your children that rules are made to be kept by children but broken by parents.
#191 You only get one chance at parenting a child. Give it your best shot!

Parenting doesn't come with an instruction manual. I can't say this book supersedes that statement. I'm not a perfect parent either. But this is just SAR 19. I hope you, guys, could grab a copy. SAR 19 is nothing compared to what you could save... Who knows, someone may be missing a lot... 

So, grab one... READ and LIVE IT...

Riyadh's Aviation Museum

'Twas just ten months ago when we first visited the aviation museum and we're back!

I think the holiday wouldn't be up to my level of satisfaction if we didn't get to do the things that we - or I - planned to do. So, on our last day of holiday, we visited Saqr Al Jazeerah again.

Luckily, the museum has a new schedule. 

 

Pardon the confusing information. Saudi's writing system starts from right to left. So, the evening session starts from 4:30 PM to 8:30 PM. You must also be wondering about the Saturday part. My husband didn't get a good view but they're also open on Saturdays from 4:30 - 8:30 PM. They charge SAR 10 per adult. Kids were not charged with entrance fees during our visit. If there will be changes, don't worry, the least they should charge kids will be SAR 5.

But then, please plan your visit during winter. Summer is not an ideal time to visit. You'll be soaked with sweat since you'll most probably be excited to see first the aircraft parked in the open area. Oh, please wear rubber shoes as you will do a lot of walking. Flat sandals are okay also but that's if you like your feet getting dusty (outside) and slippery (inside the building).

Bring bottled waters, too. There is an eating area inside the building but when we went on a week day, there was no one except the museum staff and a vending machine that's not working.

In case you'd like to do the same, we brought two camera lens, a 50mm and a 300mm for zooming. We used the zoom lens to capture the entire aircraft from a distance as we missed during our first visit. But then, it's not a must. Phone cams will do. Just beware of capturing some of the locals who visit the place too. Not all of them would want to be in photos. Unless they have their backs, like this one...

And here are some of what you will see inside the building...

Lots of aircraft which I didn't bother to know the names. I don't want to complicate my tour... Seeing them and taking photos of them are good enough...

 

There goes my husband and his friend (who works in an aviation company) giving him a one-minute crash course in flying... Well, yes, you could get into some of the aircraft - as in like take a seat, pose and click the cam shutter!... But then some of the aircraft's cockpit area are already restricted, unlike during our first visit.

The Royal Saudi Air Force Museum, or Saqr Al Jazeerah, is along the Eastern Ring Road. To make your life easy, take the road from Exit 13, head to King Khalid International Airport and in between Exits 10 and 11, on your left, you'll see this big Saudia Lockheed L-1011 Tristar guarding the gates.

So, what are you waiting for?!?!

Enjoy!

Leftover Cookies and Oreos

I have a preschooler who doesn't eat a lot and goes home with leftover cookies. Everyday, we would find unpaired cookies in her snack bag and we would always set it aside. Well, we used to grate the cookies and mix them in vanilla ice cream to have another variety; but then, we don't always buy ice cream. Kids are always prone to tonsillitis and as much as possible I'd like them to minimize sweets especially since their dad was diagnosed with diabetes.

In our case, after six months of assorted leftover cookies, we were able to fill one big bag of Ziploc. It breaks my heart to throw them all thinking of the children who never even got the chance to taste an Oreo and the guilt that eats me every time I think of the Forex conversion cost of each cookie.

So, to save the unwanted cookies and to satisfy my preschooler's sweet tooth, I made them into chocolate balls.

1. Grate the cookies until they become sandy.

2. Mix it with Betty Crocker chocolate frosting.

3. Scoop and mold them until round.

4. Roll the balls in sprinkle candies.

5. Refrigerate.

There you go! Another variety of sweets made from leftover cookies...

Eid Mubarak!

The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has only three holidays a year. One of them is the Eid Al Fitr or the Feast of Breaking the Fast, which is celebrated marking the end of the holy month of Ramadan as we all know. For several years now, my family and I have been religiously seeing the fireworks display in Prince Sultan University along King Abdullah Road in Riyadh.

During the past few years, the fireworks display was set at 9:00 PM. However, for whatever reasons we didn't know, it was set at 11:50 this year. As we called our friend, Mr. Loay, he advised that we went as early as 10:30 PM to find a good spot. So, while we - hubby, I, son, daughter and a friend - waited for the display, we took some shots...

 

Then, I had to stop as police cars came around the area and just to be sure my cam won't be snatched away, I lowered the lens... These were taken an hour before the event so the place was still open and welcoming. Few minutes before the fireworks display, not even a bicycle could pass around that area. Take note, this is not even 1/16th of the Prince Sultan University area. The other side must be very very crowded especially when royalties came to see the display too.

And... BOOM!

Fireworks were coming from this side of the buildings...

They look like falling stars...

Nice shot, even captured the smoke!

I love this one a lot! I wish to have fireworks in my wedding... :P

These booms felt like we're gonna be eaten alive! The sounds were thundering and the earth felt like shaking!

Literally heart-pounding!!!

 Credits to my husband for taking good photos of the fireworks which gave me reason to blog...

Well, the fireworks display used to be held three consecutive nights but we're  not really sure if that's gonna happen this time. There are so many changes recently that we are thinking the city is spending little compared to the previous years...

Eid Mubarak, Everyone!!!

A School Program

Haven't been to Toastmasters meetings lately. Home and family are what keeps me busy and I'm loving it. So, I told myself I have to blog it...

You know, for some reasons, I always look forward to the month of August even when I was still in grade school. Other than the fact that I was conceived that month (as I calculated nine months before my birth date), Filipino is my favorite subject and that's when we get to celebrate the Linggo ng Wika. No, the school I went to during elementary didn't have the English speaking policy so I had a very good exposure and training on the Filipino language.

I love Filipino. I love the language. Sometimes, I discourage my kids speaking in English especially when they're home. For me, I feel some situations just don't fit the language. Or I guess I'm just being a killjoy.

My kids had a three-day school program in celebration of the Buwan ng Wika at Nutrisyon. Each student level competed through dance presentation featuring Filipino culture and tradition. My preschooler presented the flower festival, so they danced to the tune of Bulaklak.

Shirt and skirt were tailored-made by yours truly; and so my wish of having a sewing machine was immediately granted. Flower accessories were custom-made by yours truly. We bought flower strands; then,  I glued each piece to a headband and a belt. I also had to cut unused ID laces to use the locks and made them as wrist and foot bands. Good thing I was on the mood for being resourceful that time.

I'd like to acknowledge my mom also for the reinforcement. It's not easy to put my youngest in the mood to dance.. Sorry for the blur, I was standing on a steel bench with few kids jumping and running around it.

My grade school student performed an interpretative dance in the tune of Ang Lahat ay Magkaugnay, by Joey Ayala.

There goes the perfect example of (over) nutrition. They're all healthy!... And costumes were not much of an effort, thank you Teacher!

Here in the kingdom, school programs, such as this, are what we, moms and dads, always look forward to since there are not much of community activities where families get together.

More to come!...

Your Body Speaks

That's the objective of the 5th speech project I completed last week during the 821st Toastmasters meeting. Had to talk using my body - you know, gestures, eye contact, pacing and all. It took me awhile to come up with that speech as I'm a bit of a shy type. Well, somehow I did manage to slacken off a little bit. And just proud of myself for being able to overcome nervousness on stage. I think I did fairly well when it comes to the delivery of the speech. Thanks to Dr. Matt McGarrity of University of Washington for the tips on the conversational way of public speaking, my delivery was more natural; though it was prepared in advance.

Anyhow, here's my speech. Thanks to the old Bengali lady, I came up with an informative manuscript.

A Subtle Talk

On my work to work this morning, I saw a big Facebook thumbs up sign along Khurais Road. Then, I remember something and I thought of sharing this with you...

When you hold up your index finger, pinkie and thumb like this (sign), the entire universe knows that you mean to say I Love You. Now, if you hold down the thumb with the middle and ring fingers, half of the world will rock and the other half will go crazy. This is the sign of the horns. In US, we know this sign is associated with the rock stars. But in Mediterranean countries, like Egypt, Lebanon, Syria or Morocco, this is used to tell a man that his wife is cheating on him. 

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and guest.

Growing up in a multi-national and multi-cultural environment is very fascinating. You meet a lot of people from different places. You get acquainted with different norms and traditions. Here in Saudi Arabia, the people around us give us a glimpse of the different parts of the world. Americans, Europeans, Middle-Eastern, Africans, Asians – we see them everywhere and yes, communicating is not easy. We always settle with the customary ‘Assalamu Alaikum’ greeting. However, communication does not always have to go with words. Most of the time, we speak without saying a word; about 80% of what we communicate is non-verbal. Smirking, winking or pouting could give a lot of meanings. Body language could give a different implication to people even when real intentions are pure. Just like how you look at me now while I speak in front.

One time there was nothing much to do in the office; I had the chance to pore over one of the cleaners, an old Bengali woman. I watched how she talked to her colleagues, her movements and facial expressions. After awhile, I approached her and we had a short chat.

Fellow Toastmasters, think about the last time you talked to a Bengali. Did you ever notice that when you speak to them, they move their chin forward? How about the frequent tilting of their heads sideways? To others, such mannerism is a bit annoying and it appears to like they don’t care about what we’re saying; but for your information they actually do it as courtesy or good manners. They actually use their chins to point at something and they tilt their heads to one side to agree with someone.

The way people listen, look, move and react affects how others see them. What we say verbally and what we act with our body are totally two different languages. The listener or the viewers have to choose whether to believe your verbal or non-verbal message; and usually, we choose the non-verbal because it’s more natural. It is an instinctive language that shows our true feelings and intentions.

People from different origins have different customs that imply different meanings to other nationalities.

Looking back at the past, we, Filipinos, being occupied by Americans for nearly a decade, have already been accustomed to their culture. We have adapted a lot. One of the most familiar hand signals of the Americans is the thumbs-up sign. Though this means “good going”, “okay”, “good job”, other nationalities like Iranians, Africans or Bengalis have a different interpretation. For them, it expresses sexual connotation or, to bluntly say, the upraised middle finger. Now I wonder if that’s one of the reasons why Facebook is not allowed in certain countries.

Anyhow, despite the struggle in talking to the old Bengali woman, with our basic English and Arabic skills, we managed to understand each other.

You see, we are faced with this challenge every day especially when we deal with other nationalities. Behavior and gestures are interpreted differently. Communication barrier has become ordinary. Knowing about the norms and traditions of our foreign brothers and sisters makes us appreciate their ways and somehow, gives us confidence as it creates a connection with them.

So, while we continuously live and work here in Saudi Arabia, in every tick of the clock, our ability to communicate effectively and appropriately with people of other cultures is challenged. It becomes more and more important to improve the sensitivity and understanding for the values, views, and ways of living and thinking of others. As the American best-seller book author Morgan Scott-Peck said, “Share our similarities and celebrate our differences.”

Unleash the Hero in Me

We all have our own preference of an ideal hero. They may take the form of animation or human. They may be visible or not. But they're everywhere. They are people or individuals who does something for others who are in need. They're selfless; they do not ask to be paid and in one way or another, they take risks to some extent.

Now, truth be told, we all want to be heroes. We all want to do something that will dramatically impact a situation - which is what we are actually doing now. Being here in the kingdom, working and providing for our loved ones. Somewhere somehow in a corner of our minds we are hoping that this sacrifice, this heroic deed, will allow us to live extraordinary lives that we all need and worked hard for.

During last week's Toastmaster meeting, the theme, Unleash the Hero in Me, was set. It was a commemoration of the Philippines Independence Day and 'twas just about the right time when Henry Cavill had his debut in the big screen as Clark Kent. I had the (third) chance again of being the Topicmaster. Below are the questions I prepared but only the first four (4) were asked to prominent and experienced Toastmasters because we were running out of time.

• Emilio Aguinaldo said, "We cannot free ourselves unless we move forward united in a single desire." How do you think will this apply to the current situation of OFWs in the kingdom?
• If you will be a hero, what heroic deed would you do for a villain?
• If you will be a superhero, what supernatural power would you like to posses - teleport, telekinesis or foreseeing of future? Why?
• People said OFWs are unsung heroes. In that case, who do you think are the villains and how did they become one?
• What is the first step of becoming a hero?
• When do you say a hero has stopped becoming a hero?
• In an animated film, the main character, Megamind said "Destiny is not the path given to us; but it is the path we choose for ourselves." Do you agree or not? Why?
• Who is sexier? Catwoman or Black Widow? Why?

I seem to be trending as Table Topics Master. I hope to try some other roles in the coming sessions and finish my manual in the soonest possible time.

Ciao!

Magic!

Magic is the art of constructing something that is desired. Spells, voodoo dolls, wands, symbols and many other objects or rituals are used to form magic. Some do it as a sign of worship; while others perform for entertainment. Regardless of the intent, magic, nowadays is evident in different forms. We may not realize this consciously but magic is the attitude of believing in yourself that you can make things happen. Things happen in our lives because of fate and there are things that we do in our lives because of choice. I would like to believe that magic is the entirety of fate, choice and perseverance because the combination of those three will give you the desired outcome.

I had another opportunity of being the Table Topics Master in one of the Toastmasters meetings held last month and here are the questions I prepared...

In the movie Pirates of the Caribbean, Captain Barbossa said, "The moonlight shows us what we really are." Please expound.

Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore said, "We must all face the choice between what is right and what is easy." Please expound.

If you will be joining the crowd of Red Queen's closest comrades, what part of your body would you sacrifice to awkwardly enlarge for the rest of your life? Why?

Would you choose to transform to an unattractive ogre, like Fiona, to be with the person you love or stay pretty and be with someone who loves you but you don't love in return? Why?

Joining the cast of Vampire Diaries and given the chance to sink your teeth into Stefan Salvatore, which part of your body would you like to bite? Why?

In the movie Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, it was said that "It is not our abilities that show what we truly are. It is our choices." Please expound.

Do you believe in magic? In what way real magic takes place in your everyday life?

'Twas indeed another wacky night; so wacky that I forgot blogging about it. Good thing, I was told to do another session this coming Tuesday. Wonder what will be the meeting theme...

See yah!

The Vision of the Specs

I have a new eyeglass on... 

Life changing and challenging... This spec is irritating and overwhelming at the same time. Irritating because my vision now has borders. Overwhelming because I am getting a clear vision... I love and hate it at the same time. And I want people to know that. So, I wrote something about it and delivered it as a speech for my Toastmaster 4th basic manual project, How to Say It.

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters and guest/s.

The ability to see is one of the most significant, if not the best, senses of an individual. We all have eyes to see things around us. We were all born with eyes. Yes, there are some who are physically disabled; yet in one way or another, they find ways to have the ability to see. But how about us, normal people, do we value our eyesight? Do we find ways to see the real thing? Do we take care of our eyes?

It’s more than a month since I got these glasses and this is not the first time. I used to have one with coating that should protect my eyes but I feel my eyeballs were always on fire. Friends told me to get lenses but I snubbed it because of the possible harmful effects. Family asked me to undergo surgery but I have to consider financial priorities first. This time, I have to start putting this on again. My myopia is getting worst.

I love seeing things. I love watching whatever is happening around me. My vision is very important for me to gather and keep memories. I like watching leaves falling from the trees during autumn. I like seeing my breath forms a fog during winter. I like it when my eyes are dancing at the sight of the vibrant flowers on spring. I could keep numerous photographs of them in my mind.

But there’s a lot more than what our naked eyes can perceive. As the saying goes, the eyes are the window of the soul. We can see through people. Just looking at them makes us feel their emotions and understand their situations. Like the pain I feel in every kick my son gets during his Taekwondo match; or the frustration I share with my husband just seeing the road traffic 5 kilometers ahead. In my case, I would have a hard time to vividly see all those things without an eyeglass. Wearing this could be a lifetime commitment and I intend to do so faithfully. Aside from having the ability to see, I would also like to have the capability to see clearly.

In my case, life is blurred without glasses. Memories are stained. The images in my mind are smudged. We may have the ways to improve our vision with the use of the latest technology yet it goes with limitations. With eyeglasses, it allows us to reflect on ourselves from time to time and show us the opportunities to clean the blotches.

Though my view will be slightly obstructed, these glasses will give me the chance to clearly see Daddy and Mommy’s wrinkles; it will give me hope to see my husband’s crow’s feet as we grow old together and the tiny toes of my children’s children. Even if I feel weight on the bridge of my nose, this bridge will serve to connect the visions to my mind where good memories are kept.

Putting on these glasses is not just about protecting my eyes or correcting vision problems. Though there are inconveniences wearing this but the benefits that one can get will outshine them. Within the four corners of this frame, life will be brighter and memories will be sharper.